Now who's Camilla ? My Thai Hi !

I did my little bit of research on Thailand before I boarded the Thai Economy flight on 7 April. Since it was a midnight flight, I hardly remember anything from the journey except for the cute and traditionally dressed Air-hostesses asking, "Vegettaariaan ?". Once I overcame the sleep deprivation, it was usual me; observe and find out about the place, the people and their practices. And here is what I felt about Thailand and the people.

The Thai people must be the most pleasant on the earth. They are almost always smiling, laughing or guffawing when they are not giggling. I believe this is a national trait with very few exceptions.

The Typical Thai People !

Thailand was previously known as Siam and they still treasure that name. It has over come a lot of mutinies, military rulers, corruption and several changes in the constitution. Yet the people generally remain happy. They have a definite discipline in day to day life that we Indians lack as a rule. Look at this Bangkok road where the busy road has an entire left lane free. I don't know how many Indian cities can boast of such a trait.

Free Left in the "Land of the Free"

Thailand ranks 54th out of 56 Asian nations when it comes to proficiency in English and this doesn't seem to bother them. You tell them about their poor English and they'll giggle and thank you with a "Kop kuun haa".

You walk into a 7-Eleven store and talk in English and the predominantly young crowd look at you and smile apologetically. Then they start to giggle and exchange words between themselves in their nasal twang. When you persist with English, they'll give you a pity-filled look for your ignorance of their beautiful language. And finally, they share a hearty laugh and their Thai customers join them in that. As a last resort, they'll resort to explaining to you in Thai language and you have no other option but to take whatever you want and leave without asking for anything more than what you can find there.

Thai mobile networks are very nice. They'll give the tourist a free SIM-card on arrival and then keep sending them messages in unadulterated Thai language.

The people here are so nice, they'll be smiling their broadest smiles even when they are busy swindling you !

Thai massage, foot massage, head massage and all those massages are a must when you are in this land. They are definitely calming and relaxing.

I am inclined to believe the name Thailand is actually a local variant of Thigh-land. In 9 days, I have seen more thighs than I have seen in 43 years of my life in India. 90% of Thai women are seen in shorts and short skirts and this is perfectly fine with this culture. To be honest, even ultra-short shorts can be too much in the heat out there.

"Sawatdee haa" is the Thai way of wishing "Namaste". It is believed to have originated from the Sanskrit word "Swasti" meaning 'blessing'. Thai people believe in their culture and language having origins in India and Sanskrit and are proud of it.

One of the ladies at the Thai massage center thought my daughter was my wife. She was obviously gossiping about the mismatch in our age. But later as an after-thought, she and asked me, "Wife ? Girlfriend ?". I replied, "Daughter". She apologized, "Oooooooooh dothaal. Sollyyyyyyyyyy. Oooooooooooooooh" !

I was there as guardian for my daughter who was shooting for her Tamil movie. We were helped there in the entire process by Indo-Bangkok films, a company owned by an Indian Punjabi called Bob. They own travel-agencies, chain of Indian hotels, restaurants and they also provide logistics and man-power for visiting Indian cine-units.

Indian Restaurant in Pattaya

Population of Thailand is 94% Buddhist with less than 5% Muslims and 1% Christians. There are very few Hindus and Sikhs. Our Indo-Bangkok Films is owned by a Sikh Bob Singh. There is another Sikh we met in Bangkok. That was Jyot, who speaks excellent Telugu due to his growing up in Vizag. He helped me to gain some kind of insight into this country. But the paradox about this country is that this predominantly Buddhist country has an omnivorous population. They eat everything under the Sun and under the sea and believe seaweeds are good for the skin !

One of our local managers was Lucky. We never got to know her original name. She was jovial, grumpy, angry and helping all in one. She was once married to a Pakistani. After the marriage ended, she developed a special liking for Indians, it seems. Her incessant smoking reminded me of the brick kilns I used to watch on the Mangalore - Udupi highway during my childhood.

Our second Thai contact was in fact the best. She was Rumrada, nicknamed Red. She is a happily plump 28 year old girl always sporting a smile and a pair of shorts with tees. She was the most proficient in English and that is why I managed to gather quite a lot of information from her. She is a Muslim. She hates marriage but loves an Indian Assistant Film Director. Her parents have given her complete freedom to manage her life and she doesn't smoke or drink. But she was totally amazed and horrified when she heard that normal Muslim girls in this part of the world can't wear shorts and can't be walking so freely like she did.

Red hates the idea of anyone dictating terms to her. This is a Thai trait. This is the most liberal of all South Asian nations. In fact they also pride themselves as "Tai" or the "Land of the Free" because Thailand was the only south Asian country never to have been colonized by a European power. Thailand also is the most liberal when it comes to LGTB rights and we can see a large number of them living with very little or no discrimination. Two of the make-up artists on our unit were from this group and they were completely natural and comfortable and were treated with no difference. Also, they smoke like anyone else.

Everyone smokes, no discrimination !

Thai people smoke in alarmingly high proportions. I could see men, women and LGTB smoking almost all the time. But I think their happy nature gives them some kind of protection against heart diseases because they have far lesser incidence of Ischemic Heart Disease compared to Indians. May be it is largely due to genetics but I do think the intrinsic happiness does play a role.

Coming to the last part of my story, I heard lucky yell at someone, "Ajay wants to see Camilla". I was surprised about this new character on the unit and was eager to see her too. So I asked her, "Now who's Camilla ?". Lucky gave me a dirty look and pointed towards the camera !

English - Thainglish !

Thai people hate the 'R' and happily leplace it with an additional "L" whenevel and whelevel possible. They have Thulsday, Flyday and Satulday to end the week. They offel you Zelo Calolies Coke and Biliyani. They smoke as if thele is no tomollooooooooo. Even Red [Led], who's pretty good with English talks like this to hel own people, "They leave tomollooo. We have to get the passpolts and allange fol duty-flee shopping in the ailpolt" !


Dr. Punned-it

Mukundan Swami and his Cricket Language !

He keeps popping up in my life like the 'breaking news' messages on those 24-Hour news channels. He is Mukundan, fondly called "Mukunda Mukunda" or "Dashavatharam" or "Swami" by me and "Kuntham" by his friends as he himself confessed. He's a class nine student in a CBSE school and only son of his doting parents. He knows my daughter too is in class nine and he thinks that might help him. He prefers to converse in English with me because his mother wanted him to improve his English by talking to that Doctor who doesn't speak good Malayalam.

But he is very unlike the teenagers on the Facebook who brag about their hitherto invisible capabilities or who warn us about their attitude. He doesn't like the word 'Dude' being used to address a girl because his Mom told him that is used only for boys. He is a very modest boy with some serious issues with English language, Science and Mathematics.

He was brought to me about 4 years ago with some persistent wheezing problems and after initiating on Inhalers, he had completely recovered from the Asthma that used to plague him. He is fond of me because he believes I had helped him to do what he loved the most; play Cricket ! Cricket is the only thing worth talking about and Sachin Tendulkar is the only God for this 15 year old with a thin mustache threatening to make it's presence felt above his upper lips.

One day, he drops into my Clinic with a doubt, "Saar, egg eating help my muscle build ?". He is from a Tambram family that still remains vegetarian. But he was impressed by a a boy twisting Sachin's arm in an Egg ad on the TV and wanted to know if he could be stronger by eating eggs. His Mom was not averse to cooking eggs for him and I told him to go ahead. He is an Eggetarian now according to himself and says, "I'll never eat chicken. I don't like bones".

His propensity to use Cricket language for every conversation is what makes him endearing to me. When I asked him about the Summative assessment part-1, he replied, "Saar, Malayalam and Social like leg side full toss. I just hit six. English always yorker. Grammar like my Grandmother. I never understand both are very tough and strict. No this thing and no that thing. Like in-swing, out-swing bowling. Ho, life is waste Saare. Don't even ask Max [Maths]. It is all bouncer going top of head. I will go to Max exam with a helmet. My head goes round round seeing question paper. Science is just nonsense Saar. Like Rohit Sharma. Everybody hates but teachers always forcing to study Science. Believe me Saar, ninth standard boy life is very tough. You just can't imagine...". I replied, "Yes my Dear, that is why I chose medical graduation because ninth grade is so very tough !" He got the sarcasm for once and gave a sheepish grin and scooted off.

He is a simple boy who shares most of his happiness and sadness with me. When his mother refused to buy a mobile phone for him, he told me, "Father cool Saar. But mother noballed my mobile. Sometimes she like Steve Buckner Saar. Always against India wrong decision. I now only no mobile boy in my group. All teases me like Jadeja Saar. I feels like out of form dropped batsman Saar".

When he finally got his prized mobile phone, he waved it at me and declared, "Saar, Umpire finally give right decision. I cry, cry and cry and she brought this. Mother is Sehwag like Saar. When good mood, she hit 300 and not good mood, she hit zero. Today, I feels like Sachin Tendulkar 100th 100 Saar. Paavam Mukundan now head lift and walk with friends. Saar all features like blue tooth and all is there. Look like Virat Kohli no ? Stylish !"

"Saar, our neighbor one Paattiamma clean bowled today Saar. She was some sugar, pressure patient. 2 days some problem and today morning not get up only. What Saar, everybody crying and my mother also crying. She was nice, not my Hitler Paatti type. She was 92 Saar. Missed century by 8, very bad Saar. All people crying I thinks like India losted match against Pakistan Saar". This is how he reported the demise of a neighborhood lady.

"Saar, my final exams coming, please pray for me Saar" said Mukundan last week. He added, "I don't know what this CBSE peoples doing. Old kids enjoyed life till class 9. We have board exams even in 9th. You know Saar, it is like a 5 match one day series. First is Monday, Social. That is good. I read 1 paragraph, I write 3 page. It is good batting pitch. Then Wednesday Science Saar. That is most terrific. It is like playing in Perth, Dale Steyn balls. I really want to take helmet to Science and Max exam Saar. Friday is Malayalam. Malayalam in my house not speak, but I manage. After 3 day rest for horror Max next Monday. That is simbly reverse swing Saar. Always confusing. Wednesday English. Grammar Saar, believe me, grammar made by people hate children. Only to torture poor children. If I don't killed, I come see you Wednesday Saar. You know Saar, Sachin Tendulkar, the God failed exams because of Max Saar. Then what is my condition ? Anyway, please pray for me Saar !"

In an age where expecting innocence in boys aged 15 years is like expecting a spinner friendly track in South Africa, Mukundan is a delightful exception and I hope he manages to keep his innocence forever !



Dr. Punned-it

Thought for Food !

Nothing in this world enthuses me as much as food. I have declared it on Facebook and elaborated it on Blogger before. But this post is all about the "Thought for Food" !

I am so obsessed with food that I often end up wishing people, "Food morning" or "Food afternoon" or "Food evening" or "Food night". This reached to ridiculous levels when I typed, "Hearty wishes for Food Friday and Feaster" on the Friday before the Easter ! Some of my Christian friends were so offended by this, they Unfriended me ! It was not entirely my fault. The keyboard has 'F' next to 'G' and when I am hungry, I can make mistakes like any human being. It just is that I am hungry most of the times !

I very well understand how hunger can turn people into Naxalites. Just half an hour delay in lunch break can turn me into a terrorist. My being born in a Community that adores, worships and ritualizes food definitely has some role in my love for food. My father is a man who believes, "Every morning, we should Rice and Shine" and I don't disagree with him.

It isn't as if I am a huge eater. I have on an occasion, eaten 25 idlees about 2 hours before dinner. And on another occasion, I had polished off 3 packets of Maggie noodles while reading Fimfare. These are old stories. I am a frugal eater today. I have a strict control now and seldom over-eat. I always stop when I can't stuff any more !

My week goes like this. Chocolate Sundae, Gulab Jamoon-day,  Orange Juice day, Breadness day, Thirst day, Fried Rice day and Saturate day ! What about my work place ? When a nurse reports about a patient having severe itching, I asked her to administer injection Avial [Avil]. Talking of Lactate solution reminds me of Milk Chocolate.

I am a law abiding person and I respect the courts. Well, I in fact adore the courts; Food Courts, especially. Though I am a complete and hopeless teetotaler, I love the bars too. They serve some of the best starters in the world. The fried cashew nuts, pea nut masala, paneer pakodas and many such delicacies make it worth going to a bar with your friends who prefer the bar over the court !

I believe in the old adage, "Seven days of not eating well makes one weak". Though I admire Gandhi for many of his virtues, I could never agree with the view that "We should eat to live and not live to eat". Blasphemy is the word ! We are born with the largest sack in the body that is stomach and the largest organ in the body that is liver. Stomach has to be filled and only then can the liver work and promote digestion. This scientifically proves my long held belief that "We are born to eat; at least I am" !

I am a Great fan of good food. So much so, the word Great itself inspires me on. But how ? Very simple, GR stands for my initial and rest is Eat ! So it keeps egging me on... GR EAT, GR EAT ! Now people should never blame me for my obsession with food and eating. I was destined for GR-EAT-NESS !

I once won a bet with a girl as to who was taller; me or she. She had promised 'Anything' if I won the bet and I asked her to buy me breakfast for the whole of next month. All boys who came to know of the story considered this a complete and total disgrace ! I just couldn't fathom why they felt so. I went on to relish extraordinary range of breakfast and super coffee from Hotel Hoysala, Bellary all at her expense for the next 30 days.

What am I supposed to do if I am reminded of "Pai Dosa" while watching "Life of Pi" and the movie "Fiza" sent me to Pizza Hut soon after the show ? The name "Sholay" makes me yearn for "Choley Bature" and whenever I see Vivek Mushran, I would love to savor "Mushroom Pepper and Salt". And just imagine watching a movie with title credits like THIS. Impossible !

Title credits of a movie !

Even though I have grown to abhor religions, I love temples for two reasons. First is for the architecture and the second of course for those exotic eatables offered there in the form of "Prasad". Some of the "Payasams" are more famous than the temples and the deities. I have never known anyone talking about the god of Ambalappuzha, but the Ambalappuzha Paalpayasam is a legend !

Tirupathi laddu is more famous than the temple itself. A large number of people including me, go there only for the sake of the laddu ! If the laddu is made available in counters at reasonable cost, I and many like me would leave the God to rest in peace !

Laddu over God !

Well, it is almost midnight now and my last grub was at 8:00 PM. If I have to "Live, Love and Laugh"; I have to catch up with something to eat. So, let me scoot and see what is there in the fridge. Thankfully Wife and Mom are fast asleep and I should be fine very soon !

Food night everyone !



Dr. Punned-it

Rape and the Indian Culture : My Sacred Left Foot !

Ever since the Delhi rape took the national media by storm, we have had unending queue of people making an ass of themselves on the print and electronic media.

A Minister said, the girls shouldn't cross the Lakshman Rekha. If they do, they'll be kidnapped like Sita of Ramayan !

A self-proclaimed Bapu blamed the girl for the rape and prophesied that she would have saved herself if she had begged them for mercy and called them "Bhayya" or brother !

The RSS chief says a woman has to satisfy a man and keep him happy for her to receive appreciation or some nonsense like that !

As women all over the country protest and people ask for tougher punishments for the offenders, these people with verbal diarrhea keep defecating through their unholy mouths. And then our Prime Minister finally opens his mouth and says, "Theek Hai" or "It's OK" !

A couple of months ago, my 14 year old daughter was harassed and abused by some pranksters on the Facebook. She protested and I too joined issues. What was the reaction we got ?

A lady said, "You should not post photos on Facebook. You should not wear exposing dresses. You should not allow boys to be friends. There are so many security controls on Facebook. So on and on...". My daughter questioned, "What if people abuse via messages and how am I supposed to know who is good and who is not ?" She got a reply, "If you sleep with your room unlocked, people will rob you".

I joined issues saying, "Facebook is not a hotel room but an open road. If some abnormal men abuse a woman in public, isn't it our duty to stand up and question them and stop them ? Doesn't she have the right to protest ?". The reply I got was very enlightening. The lady said, "I thought you people have some sense and tried to help you. But now I know you have invited this. Serves you right !"

Another man asked, "Can a 14 year old GIRL have a Facebook account ?". Having entered modeling and cinema field, my daughter has been active on Facebook and has maintained a decent decorum and I keep strict vigil on her page to keep it clean. In spite of that, some delinquents come and create nuisance.

I stopped protesting but took the direct mode of action and called those people on the given phone numbers and gave a decent warning and cut them off. But there always is a risk, some of these people might harm my child in future. So I try to keep things simple and secret. What else can a father do ?

I had to elaborate so much only because we have a mentality where people start preaching to girls how to dress, how to behave, what to do and what not to do, where to sit and where not to go and finally how to breathe in public.

I find it to be a humongous insult to entire 'Mankind' when people say, "Women wearing sexy dresses instigate men to rape them". This actually labels as every man as an entity with a tendency to rape against instigation. A small stretch of feminine skin is enough to bring the rapist out of a man ! This is what it means. I am NOT ready to buy this. I can't be and I am NOT what these people are planning to brand me !

We do have a whole hogwash of western influence being reason for rapes and abuse of women. What an unadulterated blasphemy ! Let us just look at our 'Puranas'. Let's take the God business out of them and look at them as unchronicled 'History' or even fiction. What do we see there ?

Ram wins over Lanka and frees his wife Sita. Then he forces her to jump into fire [Agni Pareeksha] before accepting her as 'pure'. And then what does the duffer do ? He abandons her in the jungle when she is pregnant just because of a drunken idiot's nonsensical and inebriated brawl. This is how history has treated women in India !

A lecherous Indra seduces the unsuspecting Ahalya by disguising as her husband. What is the result ? The woman is cursed to end up as a stone till she is redeemed from the curse by the 'lotus feet' of a man who himself abandoned his wife later for no fault of hers. This is how history has treated women in India !

The Queen of Indraprastha with five husbands gets herself pawned in a game of dice because her idiotic husband can't quit the vice. Panchali is disrobed in the court of Hastinapur with all elders and wise-men being witness to the horrible act. An eye-wash opposition and then some vainglorious statements by her husbands is all that she gets. The woman is referred to as 'Commodity' by Duryodhan and that is not opposed by anyone in that court. This is how history has treated women in India !

Just consider the fact; this was the plight of women belonging to Royal families. Now imagine what would have been the life of common-woman ! "Yatra Naaryastu Poojante, Ramante Tatra Devata" - "The God's make an abode where women are adored" says some damn scripture and then they also say, "Na Stree Swaatantryamarhasi" - "The woman doesn't deserve freedom" !

With this kind of history, legacy, wisdom, knowledge, literature and religious righteousness, do we really need western influence ? Western societies are a lot more equal and nicer to woman today than India is. This is a fact. We boast of having had a woman Prime Minister, multiple women Chief Ministers, woman President and many women in high places since ages. But most of them were foisted upon the people thanks to legacy or by the power of money or muscle. Lalu - Rabri rule is the best example for the later.

Female infanticide, ill-treatment of girl children, a clear male child bias in a large segment of our populace are eating into the fabric of our society. Ever since she is born, a girl is chained to a million rules while her brother can go out and do any mischief. "You are a girl, remember that !" follows every single girl in this country. If her family treats her without a bias, the 'well-meaning' society is always there to show her where she belongs; the kitchen !

A lady in her late forties, once visited us and gave us a lecture on the need to have a 'Son' in front of our daughter. She went blah blah in front of the 10 year old girl cuddling in my lap, "I can see you people are unhappy because you have only a girl. You people are making a mistake by waiting. You must pray and do poojas to beget a son as soon as possible. This girl belongs to someone else. You must have a Son who is the 'Kula Deepak' [Light of Family]. What is this pampering a girl ? I will pray to God to give you people a cute boy soon".

I cut her off and said, "Auntie, THIS child sitting in my lap is the 'Kula Deepika' of my family. SHE is the one we always wanted and SHE is the only child we will ever have. If you insist on a boy, please go ahead and produce one for yourself. For all of my family, this child is our world and it is beautiful only because of her !"

The lady took it badly and has never talked to me after that. Not that I care ! But unfortunately, as long as 'women' continue to believe in this kind of nonsense and wish and pray for a boy-child, our society will continue to encourage rape !

Dress Code : Only for Girls !

Those who wear the so called bold dresses know how to carry them and how to protect themselves. The 'modestly' dressed, lower middle-class women with 'virtues and values' are the worst victims of crimes against women and not the high society women.

If wearing 'sexy' or bold costumes is what encourages rape, what about men ? Salman Khan hardly ever wears a shirt and there are so many studs showing off their naked bodies. How about women getting turned on by this blatant nudity ? Isn't that wrong too ?

And what about our temples insisting upon men to strip before entering the temples ? The matter of fact is most of male nudity is disgusting. As disgusting as what some women feel about Rakhi Sawant. But why no moral codes of conduct for men ?

All India needs is for the people to grow up. A boy who flirts around with many women is a 'stud' whereas a girl going out with men even as part of her job is a 'slut'. It is this mentality that has chained us. Dress code doesn't stop rapes. A code that treats man and woman as equal and prevents and forbids bias from childhood alone can prevent rapes.

I wind up this long but extremely passionate post with one of my Facebook updates, which came straight from the heart !

Capital Punishment for Rape ?

Not just right. A lot of our own Soldiers, Police personnel, Superiors in office and even Doctors will have to be hanged till death in that case.

Death by "Rope" is too small a punishment for "Rape", the most heinous crime ever; worse than murder !

We must have a law amended in such way that if proved, a Rapist must be punished with...

Dismemberment of the instrument used for rape along with castration and then he should be divested all jobs, degrees and privileges of life and left with just two options; Begging for mercy or death !

PS: This might sound a little anarchic and perhaps like a medieval law. But a sick act like rape can't be treated with kid-gloves ! Many of those dismembered beggars walking the footpath can be a very strong deterrent for future offenders !

Dr. Punned-it

Tea with Salt, Some Pride and More Prejudices !

"All generalizations are wrong", said some wise man, "including this one !". But we all tend to generalize when it comes to what is right and what is wrong, according to us. We were chatting about the nice Tea served in our Hospital canteen. I casually told, "In certain parts of Himachal Pradesh, they drink Tea with salt". Immediately a sister shot back, "Ayyo God, what is that horrible taste ? Yuck. Thulasi sister gave tea with salt to her husband on April Fool's day !"

This put me in thinking mode. It is true that most people in the world drink Tea; with milk, without milk, with sugar, without sugar and with a lot of flavors. But not many drink Tea with salt. But does that make it wrong ? It just represents the taste of a population or perhaps an ethnic group. But very heavily opinionated are we and thus we think what others do is weird ! This has been discussed on this blog earlier.

People have no problem with Jasmin Tea, Masala Tea, Lemon Tea, Orange Tea, Iced Tea and many more flavors. With or without sugar has been accepted without much problem. But talk about Tea with salt and a lot of people go, "Yuck !". I questioned the wisdom of ridiculing something without tasting. I said, "We can't say like that. Taste differs from region to region, time to time and from people to people."

The sister gave me a lecture, "See Doctor, there is a proportion and combination for all ingredients in everything we consume. We can't add chillies to Payasam and we can't add sugar to Sambar. You can't prepare chicken sambar, it has to be chicken curry. Similarly, vegetables can't be eaten without some coconut grates. blah blah..."

I replied patiently, "Sister, you have got it all wrong. Udupi Brahmins add jaggery to Sambar and they believe Sambar is incomplete without that. You've never tried adding chicken to Sambar. Try that and then decide. I agree we need proportion but combinations can vary. Many people eat pickles with Payasam and you Malayalees eat pappadam with Payasam. Why is that ? You need something extra to the taste, right ? We can never say someone else has yuck taste. To each his or her own"

I must admit, I wasn't quite brave and didn't taste tea with salt when I went to Kullu and Manali in 1999. Looking back in time, I realize I have been terribly judgmental. One of my relatives used to eat jack fruit dipping in coffee and everyone in our ancestral home used to ridicule his tastes and I was one of the everyone. A little teenager I know, loves mangoes with yoghurt and her younger brother thinks that is sick and I did agree with him.

I always wondered how could Gujarati people eat 'jalebis' first thing in the morning and how could Malayalees start a day with 'beef and porotta' when "Idlee - Sambar" was the only thing worth eating for breakfast ! I also have never dared to try the Kerala pickles because they are 'damn too spicy' according to me !

Watching Fazil's "Kaiyethum Doorath" in 2002, I had passed my judgment on Shanu Fazil that this one is a dud. I had even blamed Fazil for trying to make a completely useless son into a star. Almost a decade later, the reinvented Fahad Fazil is on a roll today and being vegetarian, I hate the idea of eating crow !

I have come to understand it is extremely wrong on  anyone's part to decide what is right and what is wrong for others. Well, I am not talking about issues like legal system and such. But generalizing 'our' ways as right and 'their' ways as wrong is plain and simple, wrong !

This exactly is why I have come to distance myself from religions and moved towards free-thinking. I refuse to be bogged down by people who preach about gods and rituals. But I also refuse to interfere with their right to do what they love to do without bothering me. If something gives someone happiness and peace without infringing upon someone else' rights or freedom, so be it !

Satire and sarcasm are two things I have inherited along with the A-Positive blood group. I have often hurt people without intending to and looking back at such instances makes me cringe. But, everyday in life is spent in trying to rise above the superstitions, prejudices and stupidities without trading upon the toes of others. It is tough but I think it is worth trying than live with vainglorious pride and petty prejudices !


Dr. Punned-it

10 Reasons Why It Can't be "The End" on 21 December 2012 ?

The world which was supposed to end at the onset of the new millennium got a fresh lease of life and has survived till now. It is now programmed to end on 21 December 2012. But will it end ? The answer is an emphatic NO !

But why ? What gives me so much of confidence to say so conclusively ? There are hundreds of reasons. But ten most important clinching factors alone can be enumerated in a blog-post and here are the reasons...

Ten Reasons why the world can't end on 21December 2012

1] Rajnikanth's Kochadaiyan hasn't been released. That means, 'The End" has to wait !

2] Congress party has promised to deliver all their promises under the dynamic leadership of Rahul Gandhi if they win the 2014 general elections. It just can't be "The End" !

3] The exact loss to the exchequer in the 2G scam hasn't been determined. It just can't be "The End" without arriving at the exact figure, be it 0 or those facile figures quoted by the CAG !

4] Well of course, Sachin Tendulkar has not retired because it would be selfish to retire when the world needs him more than any time before. The writing is on "The Wall". The God has to take the call in "The End" !

5] Obama has declared the best is ahead for America. If he said so, how can it be "The End" ?

6] Salman Khan has given clear indication that the Tiger wants to be tamed by the Kat. The world has no business to say "The End" till he really becomes "Ek THA Tiger"!

7] My neighborhood uncle aged 87, pooh-poohed the whole issue saying his horoscope says he is destined to live till 96 years and the horoscope can't be wrong. That means we are safe at least till "The End" of 2021 !

8] In 2010, the LIC sanctioned me a home loan for a 15 year tenure. That pushes "The End" a little farther than all other reasons cited !

9] India and Sri Lanka haven't played a bilateral ODI series for a long time now. If it has to be "The End", it has to be during one of those endless ODI series. So the wait is on !

10] "The End" can't be here until India decide how "The End" of Afzal Guru will come; Dengue, heart attack or hanging !

At "The End" of the day, "The End" of the days isn't here. Not so soon !

So let us all relax and wait for the thing most worth waiting for: "Kochadaiyan" !

Not "The End" !!!

Dr. Punned-it

Life is Beautiful but not for all !

She laughed, she jumped, she hopped around and then she cried like a baby. I asked, "Why are you crying ?" She replied, "I fell and that is why I am weeping and now I want to see my Mom". She is here this moment and then cuddling her puppy the other moment. She emphatically declared that the lemon tea in my cup was not tea but was in fact "Drink". She even smelt the drink to confirm her verdict. Completely busy and all over the place; she is my new friend, Lakshmi.

She asked me, "When are you leaving ?". I replied, "Tomorrow". "So where will you sleep ?" was her next question. "In your home" I replied. She shot back, "Oho, not possible. People like you can't sleep in my house. You have to sleep in a hotel". Quite wise for someone so young, right ?

She announced, "My name is Lakshmi in school and that is my school". So I asked, "Which is that school ?". She replied, "Lakshmi Devi school". "So why are you here ?" I asked, "Why haven't you gone to school ?". Pat comes her reply in her own language, "My father has gone to bring money. He'll come back with lots and lots of money and then I'll join school after Deepawali".

She rushes into her makeshift shelter at the construction site and comes back with a slate and chalk. She shows me, "A, B, C, D, E, F" and asks, "Do you know this is English ?". I reply, "Well, I know a little bit". She assures me, "Don't worry, when my Dad comes back with a lot of money, I'll give you a lot of money and then you too can learn English from Lakshmi Devi school. It's my school and this is my home" she spreads both her arms widely and gesturing towards the under construction building where I am sitting and typing now.

This is Lakshmi, whose mother works at the construction site and father is an imaginary figure. He doesn't exist because he passed away when she was hardly 3 months old on a construction site. He fell down from the top of the building. Her mother doesn't know any other job and has to work in the same unsafe and in fact extremely dangerous construction sites where her husband lost his life.

Lakshmi eats what is given to her by the shooting people. She hasn't seen the world outside. She is three and a half and should have been in school but is not there. Will she ever go to school ? But she has twinkle in her eyes and has enormous zeal for life that every kid is blessed with. But as she grows up, all the zeal will be replaced by disappointment, anger, dissent, and disillusionment. Life is beautiful but not for everyone !

I am here in Hyderabad accompanying my teenage daughter who is pursuing her dream and passion of becoming an actor. Leaving behind my job and the air-conditioned comfort of my cozy cabin in our ICCU, I am sitting in the dusty construction site as escort to my daughter because my mother and wife couldn't go with her this time.

I realized a few things. Becoming an actor is an extremely tough job and you need passion for that. I abhor the chaos. I also realized I can survive without air condition and my time-table. Life is much more intricate than the death-inspiring ICCU I am living in for almost 18 years now. It also gave me an opportunity to tell my daughter how fortunate she is.

But most importantly I realized a bitter truth. There are millions of Lakshmis in India whose mothers or parents can provide them with some food, makeshift shelters and a lot of dreams. Just beautiful but completely false dreams and nothing more. Growing up in permanently changing thatches and tents, the childhood is lost in being mere time-pass for people like me.

One person can perhaps make a small difference in the life of one Lakshmi or may be a few. But what happens to those million others ? I don't know ! Tomorrow I have to leave her behind and return to my fortress because that is the cruel reality. We can feel bad, we can blame the society, we can curse the governments and we can take stances. But finally we can do just a little bit to make life a little better.

I believe we need to evolve a system where every little child is assured of his or her childhood, education, hygienic living, decent food and some respect and not just crumbs of food and vainglorious sympathy. We need to make a difference. Can we ? Or will we ?


Dr. Punned-it