Thought for Food !

Nothing in this world enthuses me as much as food. I have declared it on Facebook and elaborated it on Blogger before. But this post is all about the "Thought for Food" !

I am so obsessed with food that I often end up wishing people, "Food morning" or "Food afternoon" or "Food evening" or "Food night". This reached to ridiculous levels when I typed, "Hearty wishes for Food Friday and Feaster" on the Friday before the Easter ! Some of my Christian friends were so offended by this, they Unfriended me ! It was not entirely my fault. The keyboard has 'F' next to 'G' and when I am hungry, I can make mistakes like any human being. It just is that I am hungry most of the times !

I very well understand how hunger can turn people into Naxalites. Just half an hour delay in lunch break can turn me into a terrorist. My being born in a Community that adores, worships and ritualizes food definitely has some role in my love for food. My father is a man who believes, "Every morning, we should Rice and Shine" and I don't disagree with him.

It isn't as if I am a huge eater. I have on an occasion, eaten 25 idlees about 2 hours before dinner. And on another occasion, I had polished off 3 packets of Maggie noodles while reading Fimfare. These are old stories. I am a frugal eater today. I have a strict control now and seldom over-eat. I always stop when I can't stuff any more !

My week goes like this. Chocolate Sundae, Gulab Jamoon-day,  Orange Juice day, Breadness day, Thirst day, Fried Rice day and Saturate day ! What about my work place ? When a nurse reports about a patient having severe itching, I asked her to administer injection Avial [Avil]. Talking of Lactate solution reminds me of Milk Chocolate.

I am a law abiding person and I respect the courts. Well, I in fact adore the courts; Food Courts, especially. Though I am a complete and hopeless teetotaler, I love the bars too. They serve some of the best starters in the world. The fried cashew nuts, pea nut masala, paneer pakodas and many such delicacies make it worth going to a bar with your friends who prefer the bar over the court !

I believe in the old adage, "Seven days of not eating well makes one weak". Though I admire Gandhi for many of his virtues, I could never agree with the view that "We should eat to live and not live to eat". Blasphemy is the word ! We are born with the largest sack in the body that is stomach and the largest organ in the body that is liver. Stomach has to be filled and only then can the liver work and promote digestion. This scientifically proves my long held belief that "We are born to eat; at least I am" !

I am a Great fan of good food. So much so, the word Great itself inspires me on. But how ? Very simple, GR stands for my initial and rest is Eat ! So it keeps egging me on... GR EAT, GR EAT ! Now people should never blame me for my obsession with food and eating. I was destined for GR-EAT-NESS !

I once won a bet with a girl as to who was taller; me or she. She had promised 'Anything' if I won the bet and I asked her to buy me breakfast for the whole of next month. All boys who came to know of the story considered this a complete and total disgrace ! I just couldn't fathom why they felt so. I went on to relish extraordinary range of breakfast and super coffee from Hotel Hoysala, Bellary all at her expense for the next 30 days.

What am I supposed to do if I am reminded of "Pai Dosa" while watching "Life of Pi" and the movie "Fiza" sent me to Pizza Hut soon after the show ? The name "Sholay" makes me yearn for "Choley Bature" and whenever I see Vivek Mushran, I would love to savor "Mushroom Pepper and Salt". And just imagine watching a movie with title credits like THIS. Impossible !

Title credits of a movie !

Even though I have grown to abhor religions, I love temples for two reasons. First is for the architecture and the second of course for those exotic eatables offered there in the form of "Prasad". Some of the "Payasams" are more famous than the temples and the deities. I have never known anyone talking about the god of Ambalappuzha, but the Ambalappuzha Paalpayasam is a legend !

Tirupathi laddu is more famous than the temple itself. A large number of people including me, go there only for the sake of the laddu ! If the laddu is made available in counters at reasonable cost, I and many like me would leave the God to rest in peace !

Laddu over God !

Well, it is almost midnight now and my last grub was at 8:00 PM. If I have to "Live, Love and Laugh"; I have to catch up with something to eat. So, let me scoot and see what is there in the fridge. Thankfully Wife and Mom are fast asleep and I should be fine very soon !

Food night everyone !



Dr. Punned-it

An Open Letter to Whom it may Concern or Not !

To:

The Corporation / Local Government / State Government / Central Government / Political Parties / Non-Political Groups / Clubs / NGOs / The Judiciary / Anyone to whom it may concern or not
Kochi, the so called Financial Capital of God's Own Country also known as Smart City.
Kerala, India, Asia, Planet Earth.

Subject:

State of our Roads or the Roads of our State !

References:

1] An Emotional Journey !
2] Left, Right and Wrong; A Story of a Fight !
3] Footpath, My Foot !
4] The Blogger who traveled the Untrodden Narrow Path !
5] All Roads Lead to Hell Part-I
6] The Queen of Arabian See in God's Own Country !

Sir / Madam / Your Honor / Worshipful Mayor / Your Highness / Anything that pleases you,

Hereby let me introduce myself  before I begin the letter. I am  a Santro Xing Car with Reg. number KL-7 BD 6826 registered under Kochi Corporation in August 2008. I have produced a latest passport size photograph of myself for identification purpose. Please don't be surprised about a Car that is writing a letter. I can even talk. Kindly refer to reference number 1. An emotional Journey.

My Master, who claims to be a Doctor and a Blogger has written something about me and quite a lot about the roads of my hometown Kochi. Kindly refer to those stories too. It is important to understand the whole picture. Though Dr. Pun-dit is not very kind to me, I still am a loyal servant and continue to work for him without complaining. This isn't about my loyalty or his cruelty. I shall in due time write to SPCC [Society for Prevention of Cruelty to Cars] about that. So you needn't worry on those issues.

Defaced and Defiled

Now let me enlighten you about that ugly scar on my face under the nose. I mean the dent on the number plate. This dent was caused by a two wheeler who collided with me tail on [Opposite of Head on]. No, it wasn't his mistake. It wasn't my mistake either. Both of us were traversing through the quagmire people have now come to accept as an eternal truth that is 'Thammanam - Pulleppady Road' in the heart of Kochi town. The poor chap bounced and bobbed out of one of those potholes and I couldn't escape from the collision because I too was coming out of another bigger pothole. I am now providing some photographs of 'the Road' for your reference.

Road in the Heart of Kochi !

The Cursed Thammanam - Pullepady Road

 Potholes that can kill !

No Sir, this letter is not about the collision or the dent either. I can and will live with this. People manage to live with much worse. Let me move to the more serious matter. It is about something far more important. It is about our existence itself. The existence of Carkind / Autokind / Bikekind or Vehiclekind in general.

Humans are concerned about Mankind. So we have to be concerned about ourselves too. Humans can eat Pizzas if bread isn't available. But we will not be able to live and move without our life blood that is Petroleum fuel. So kindly watch the video attached.

The little boy is more concerned about future and is far more intelligent than the father. You might have watched this video about conserving fuel and energy. But I politely request you to watch it again. I will continue with the matter after the video. Thanks for the patience you have shown with me. But my intent and concern is genuine and I hope I will be able to convince you about it when we come to the concluding part.

Now, we all know our Governments, leaders, Babus, NGOs and everyone with an opinion has something to preach for the common man. That common man, one of whom is my Master. He too is a concerned citizen and I have seen him preach about conserving nature, electricity, trees, fuel, paper, food, water and just about anything. This anything includes everything except my dignity. Well, let me not elaborate on that. I will deal with those issues at an appropriate time on an appropriate podium.

Let me suffice to say this. My Master calls me "Fuel Guzzling White Little Monster". That is such an insult and I have communicated to him my displeasure about it. But he has persisted with his diatribe. When I asked him why he calls me so, he said I have a very poor fuel efficiency. Yes, I give 9 KmPL in the city. In Kochi city. I am not aware what other members of the Carthren [Car Brethren] manage. But this is the best I can achieve. But I have always maintained this wasn't my fault but the poor roads were responsible.

My Master is not fond of main roads. He is The Blogger who travels the Untrodden Narrow Path ! So I really can't blame his driving or the traffic for the low fuel efficiency. But I still was confident I will be able to prove myself when the opportunity arises.

Thus I got my first chance in 4 years to prove my worth, efficiency and power. I took my Master and his little family to Kovalam last week. Oh what roads ! I felt like a bird out of the cage and actually went flying. I managed to overtake Cars twice as bigger, SUVs and practically everything on my way. I took 4 hours 50 minutes from Kochi to Kovalam and 4 hours 10 minutes for the return journey.

This isn't vainglorious boasting. This is just a true piece of information to bolster my case. The most important factor was I covered 490km with less than 29 liters of Petrol. That is a fuel efficiency of 17 KmPL. But I needed a chance to prove myself. In Kochi, I would be burning almost 55 liters for the same distance. Now, this is a phenomenal achievement. I knew I was capable of this.

Sir, just imagine this. Travel through decent roads improved my fuel efficiency by 88.88%. Which means the traffic congestion alone isn't responsible for the abysmal fuel efficiency in cities. The poor infrastructure is more so. I have informed above, the fact that my Master almost never gets stuck in traffic because he never takes the main roads. But all the side roads, interior roads and roads in residential areas are in total shambles.

If we manage to improve the overall infrastructure in the suburbs, interiors and the small roads, we might succeed in decongesting the traffic in major arteries. All vehicles conveying through better and lesser trodden roads can save hell of a lot of fuel. Even 50% saving is a huge saving. Switching off the engine in traffic lights can't save you so much of petrol.

Now if I alone could save so much of fuel in one journey, imagine how much of fuel all those millions of vehicles on our roads can manage to save !

Sir, I don't know who you are. I don't even know if you are a Sir or a Madam. That is why I have used so many references and salutations at the beginning. Let me stress again here that I am genuinely concerned. Concerned about nature, fossil fuels, mother earth and all.

Sir, please let us 'Go green'. Let us improve our roads and infrastructure and save fuel and save Earth and save ourselves. Let us save Ourselves from Ourselves !

Thanks for the patient reading.

Sincerely,

Santro Xing [Reg. No: KL-7 BD 6826]